I was thinking about buying a gun. Not a simple long barrelled firearm such as a shotgun, or hunting rifle, but a handgun to be precise. Such an item without question presents a few additional purchasing obstacles. For a simple purchase of a common handgun there is paperwork to fill out and a background check during a three day waiting period.
Considering my mental stability both short and long term, I would have to question the various governmental agencies that would approve, after a background check, a weapon application from my humble personage. They, despite their collective all seeing and all knowing knowledge, certainly don’t know my frame of mind or the random thoughts that occasionally flash across the front of my eyes. (not that they are all bad flashes) I will confess that computer searches will show no arrest records and no indeterminate or lengthy visits to state and or federal mental institutions.
Granted, my youthful records are clean, but not really because I never did anything wrong … more-so … because, like most people, I never got caught red-handed in a prosecutable indiscretion. I have for the most part been a pretty good boy … despite the divorces which could be reasoned as selective cases of poor judgement or momentary periods of decreased mental capacity. There might be an argument against me there.
To complicate matters, I was also thinking of getting a concealed weapon permit. Despite adding another layer of bureaucracy, what good would the handgun be if it sat home in a drawer all the time. Of course, I would have to take a firearms course, a firing range test, a written test and pass another background check. That again could bring up the selective cases of poor judgement or momentary periods of decreased mental capacity.
So, possibly in the near future, exceeding my expectations and holding a concealed weapon permit, I would then have to worry about where to carry the weapon. Carried on the hip, left or right, my waistline silhouette would be ruined. That would not be desirable even for a fat old guy. We can, at times, be quite guarded about our public presentation in a mixed gender environment.
So, a ruined silhouette can be a touchy topic of conversation. Plus in my wheelchair, I would have trouble getting into and out of the device with a waist gun and wouldn’t be able to speedily extricate the weapon if the undesirable circumstance presented itself. It would be highly possible, if not probable, that I would end up shooting myself. That is not desirable either and seems to be a possible reoccurring theme.
Now if I carried the concealed weapon in a shoulder holster where it would rest heavily against my armpit and side, another set of problems come to the forefront. On warm or hot days I would sweat all over the shoulder holster and handgun. It wouldn’t take long before I would smell like a horse’s rear-end, rancid gun oil and rapidly rusty metal. The compromised weapon would also be too slippery to be of good use. I would also be shunned by the general public within a twenty foot radius. This would also be another circumstance where the odds, ever increasing, of shooting myself with a sweat and gun oil slippery weapon becomes highly elevated. That … would not be desirable for many reasons.
Contemplating my options, it is highly probable I will have to carry my concealed handgun in a shoe box that rests in my lap. But that is where I carry my collapsible cane and considering how many times it falls out of my lap, the shoebox handgun is not such a good idea. Those things do not bounce well and can discharge accidentally. That neither …. would be desirable for many reasons.
Well, there is a lot to think about before deciding upon a path of action. There is more to investigate … more to study and price. Despite a few pros and some cons and a high probability of extensive personal injury lurking on the horizon, I am still thinking about buying a gun.
Next Week … Something Interesting or something current …
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